Cause I got no self esteem
by Twilighter-Emma
Summary: Edward walks in on Bella crying and doesn't know why she's crying. He never knew that she has Self-Esteem issues. And for once Bella feels like she's actually winning the change argument. One-shot unless more is wanted. BxE


As I sat in my room waiting for Edward to come over, I couldn't help but think how beautifully perfect Edward is, with his gorgeous bronze hair, dazzling eyes, perfect nose, the list goes on!, Edward is perfect, and I look dull and plain. It brought tears to my eyes thinking about how absolutely ordinary I am, I have always had self-esteem issues and I have never told Edward or anyone that.

Speaking of Edward, he should be here any minute; Charlie's probably gone to bed now. Proving me right, I faintly hear Charlie snore. Right on time, "Bella, love, I am sorry that I am late but apparently my shirt wasn't the right shade of blue for these pants and Alice wouldn't let me lea- Have you been crying?" He cut himself of when he had stopped kissing my hand and looked me in the eye.

"No I haven't been why?" I tried to smile but he saw straight through it.

"Bella darling, what's wrong? what has upset you?" Concern lacing his voice.

"Nothing has upset me, I was just thinking about stuff but it's ok now"

"It's not ok now, you were crying and it upsets me to know that you were crying, please, why were you crying?" He was dazzling me and he knew it.

"Well-I was just- thinking about me and umm how umm plain and stuff I am" I knew I was babbling but I couldn't help it.

"WHAT? how are you plain Bella?, you are not plain, what makes you think this?" Now, he was mad.

"Look at me Edward, really look at me, I am not beautiful, I am not even pretty" By now I was in tears.

Edward looked sad, really sad. This why I don't tell him this kind of thing, it makes him upset and I hate seeing him upset.

"Bella, you are the most beautiful person that I have ever met, I wish you would see yourself clearly" He looks like he would be crying like me, if he could. "And tell me what about yourself you don't think is beautiful or pretty, I can guarantee that you're wrong"

I took a deep breathe and decided to start from my head to make my way down 'Well, my hair is too thick, my eyes are too brown- like poo, my nose is too pointy , I have man shoulders, my back bends weird, my stomach isn't flat, I have practically no boobs, my legs are too thin." "I think I have very good reason"

Now he looked absolutely outraged.

"Bella, your hair is the most beautiful, softest hair and I love running my hands through it, your eyes are no where near "poo" they are the only way I can see what you're feeling except when you're asleep, your nose isn't pointy it is perfectly rounded, your shoulders are too thin to be called man shoulders, all females back bends at their lower back it's not just you, why would you want to have a flat stomach? It's a stupid illusion that all "famous" people think is hot, and for your boobs, they are what make it the hardest for me to resist your body, and I don't why you think your legs are too thin, I think they're perfect, and so does Mike Newton for that matter" He chuckled before cupping my face into his hands and looking me straight in the eyes.

"I love you exactly how you are, there's nothing I would change about you" he whispered.

By now I was crying, but not for the same reason as before, now it was because of how absolutely perfect he is, and how pretty he makes me feel even when I'm not. But then I thought about this Tanya person who likes my Edward, Alice who was with Jasper but still gorgeous, and Rosalie. I sighed out loud. Rosalie the most beautiful person/vampire in the world, Rosalie with looks that would make Miss Universe doubt herself, and all the other vampires that Edward is around at some point. And still he chooses me, plain old Bella.

I couldn't think of a reply to that so I just nodded like an idiot.

"You still don't believe me do you?"

"Does it matter?" I didn't think even _he_ would hear it, but of course, he did.

"Bella!" he sighed angrily "What do I have to do to make you see the truth, is there anything I can do?"

"Yes, but you won't do it" All our arguments always seem to get back to this one subject, my change.

"Are you serious, me changing you, damning you into eternal hell, would make you see the truth, Bella, with or without the change you'll always be the most beautiful person in my life." He sounded desperate, for the fist time ever, it seemed like I was winning.

"Edward, it won't be eternal hell if you're there with me, I've told you that" I said grasping his hand tightly in mine. "And yes, if I was changed, it would make me feel pretty and maybe, if it goes good, maybe even beautiful!"

I waited for him to reply, but he didn't look like he was going to, of course, just as I think I've won, I haven't.

But Edward surprised me when he spoke.

"Bella, do you really want to be changed, I mean really want to, not just a maybe?" He spoke quietly. I was shocked, stunned, and ecstatic.

At first I couldn't breathe.

"Breathe Bella"

Oh right, breathing, I could do that.

"Edward, I want this more then anything in the world, I want us to be equal, I don't want you to have to be so careful around me, and I just want to know that we'll have all eternity with each other, that's all I want". He grabbed both of my hands in his and locked our fingers together.

"Bella, I will change you, but, I want something in return."

"Anything, I'll do anything you want" I quickly replied.

He moved us so we were both standing up, then knelt down in front of me, as though he was tying up his shoe laces.

"Isabella Marie Swan, you are the love of my life, will you marry me?" He looked at me closely waiting to see if I was going to reject him. As if I would.

Before I could help myself I was crying.

"Of course I'll marry you Edward, I love you" I cried, hugging him, Charlie's snoring skipped a beat.

"Woops" I laughed.

Edward reached into his pocket and pulled out a small dark blue velvet box and opened it, inside was the most beautiful ring I have ever seen, it was white gold with a very big blue diamond surrounded by lots of little white diamonds. It was beautiful.

"Read what's inside the band, love". He said, still on his knees hugging me around my waist.

Inside the band in very small writing that was very neat, Edward probably did it himself, it said,

"_I'll love you for an eternity"_

I cried, dropping to my knees so that I was level with him. He grabbed my left hand, and put the ring on the appropriate finger, "I love you" he whispered then kissed the ring on my finger.

"Ok!" I jumped up. "Let's go"

"Bella it's two-thirty in the morning, no minister will marry us right now". He laughed.

"Edward, Edward, Edward, haven't you heard of the saying "if there's a will there's a way?""

"Yes, but there is no way" he was looking at me like I was high one something.

"Ah, but there is a way, it can be summed up in one single word, Vegas".

"Mrs. Future Cullen, you are very mischievous." He said grinning like an idiot.

"That I am, and I want to be changed the next day" I demanded.

"Ok, so you don't want a honeymoon?"

"Yes, but I want to be changed first, then we can honeymoon for two hundred years if we want"

"True very true". "Well I'm going to go and get the Volvo, you write Charlie a letter, we'll come visit after the wedding, and you can stay for as long as you want, before you get changed, because you have to understand this, this might be the last time you see him. He said very seriously.

"I'll visit then the day after that I get changed, deal?"

"Deal".

Sweet.

While Edward got the Volvo, I wrote a note to my dad that will certainly be a shock.

_Dad,_

_Edward and I have decided to go to Vegas and get married, I am not too young, I love him and that's all that matters. So next time I see you, which will be in around three days, I'll be Mrs. Isabella Marie Cullen._

_I love you,_

_Bella and Edward._

"Ok Bella, I've packed your stuff lets go" Edward called from out the front.

"Ok, let's do this".


End file.
